Friday, September 30, 2011

Crepe with Chocolate Syrup (Highlights of the Week)

This week has been pretty awesome and I absolutely enjoyed it so much!

My boss got back from vacation on Sunday and we (the team) missed her so much! She got us 'tajin' which is like a small pot-ish thing that they put in salt & cinnamon in Morocco, instead of pepper.

Next week, we got Customer Service week (which is a program prepared by the higher people in the presidency to promote the importance of customer service) and my office mate prepared alot so I hope it works out really well!

OMG on the 27th me and some of my colleagues/friends had the opportunity to watch this!!!

Yup! We went to watch "Joseph Clark- The Music of Queen (Special Opening)"!!! My first umm musical...well it's not really a musical, it's kinda like a concert~ Anyways, it was my first time and it was incredible!! I don't know all of their songs so this concert was an eye opening for me :)
That also made me understand why concerts are awesome and important! When you're there hearing them live, it's amazing and gives you a better reason to love the music! and you are surrounded by people that enjoy it! XD my seat mate and I were just singing along to the songs and the concert got super awesome as it was ending!! Thank you Freddy Mercury and May You Rest in Peace.

After that night, I had a long nice coversation with my best friend and admit to her that I made a long deep reflection about myself. I'm finally starting to be more aware about myself and slowly begin to love myself. I still say things like "it's because I'm stupid" but only because it's a full honest reason to something stupid gone wrong. I'm slowly learning the things that I like to do and to look at as something maybe for a career. MAYBE~ To clarify myself, lately I've been enjoying having people's company and love to talk to them and hear them what they say. I love humanly connection and understanding how our brains works. When no one's around me, I get really sad and lonely! That is so strange and new to me because I used to enjoy being alone!! X0

The next day was my birthday :) I turned 24! The first time in 2 years that I felt so much happiness and gratefulness of the many things that I've gone through and learned. My job, my work place is the BEST! All the colleagues came to me and congratulated to me and made my day a big deal!!! I was continuously speechless when someone congratulates me! I was super happy!
What's awesome about my office is that every month they throw a birthday party for those people's birthday on that month!
My boss took us out to lunch and, of course, I devoured myself with sushi!! No food satisfies me the way sushi does! Not even chocolate!! heheh :D My boss and team member/friend surprised me and my other team member (because he's also September boy) with gifts and cards!! It was amazing what they got me I couldn't believe they got me this!!!

I still couldn't believe it! And the card was cute too! I played it Thursday night and today morning (Friday 30th). It's a super k0oo0l workout! If you love dancing rather than typical exercise, then this is for you.

I love my job and I love my workplace! Very untypical and almost everyone there is young and happy and excited!  I thank all my colleagues for being themselves! And I thank my best friend for being there for me and loving me lots!! I love you!! <3

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Before I Turn 24

OMG my poor blog!!! TT.TT; I feel bad for ditching it again because of work and me being too lazy >..>

Nevertheless, I decided to share with you this reflection of myself before I turn 24. It wasn't easy to write it but here it is!

Ever since I started my working life, I didn't draw as much as I used to. I probably drew on weekends. When I started working at my second job (my current job), I completely stopped drawing and would go for months not holding the pencil or open in Photoshop and doodle with my tablet. It just took most of my is gone as I am in the office early morning and not back until night time. I always get home exhausted and too tired to do or deal with anything at home.

Working in my current job actually helped me alot and opened my eyes to many things I was unaware of and of things I didn't want to admit to.

The biggest epiphany I had was on the last few weeks of August. I had to do a revision with my boss regarding my next steps as a career woman. Most of the questions were things like "Where do you see yourself in the next xx years", "what job career are you looking to do next" etc. and all I had was question marks bouncing on my head and my manager really wanted to whack me for not knowing what I want to do next. I was plainly honest when I said I didn't know. She was shocked. I think she was really surprised how is someone like me confused and unsure.
Since then, I  also couldn't stop thinking. I didn't think it was weird, but I thought how am I going to move on in life if I don't know what I want?

As I continue to think, suddenly it hit me. I now know why I stopped drawing. I now know why I don't know what I want.
It's because I gave up on myself. Not just as a career woman. But as a human being. I gave up trying my best. I gave up believing and learning for myself. I stopped caring that I can be good to great to awesome. I thought I'd be ok with just doing my job as a regular employee.
Eventhough I love art and drawing animation, I stopped and gave up because I didn't believe I could improve because there were others who were better than me. It scared me. It intimidated me. So I settled with what I got and didn't care about myself to not disappoint anyone.

I decided for the last few days as a 23 yr old, I started to do the following:

. To love myself and adore who I am because no one will
. To take care of myself because no one will
. To appreciate myself and what I have because I am unique and will continue to learn what makes me unique
. To not look down at myself
. To not be afraid to teach when I can
. To work hard in not hurting myself
. Never giving up without a fight
. To open up and talk to others
. To be more honest
. To stop being scared
. To keep trying everything

I will continue to do so and practice it forever because no one will do this for me and no matter what good things people say about me, I won't believe it.

I realized the way I think is not fair and is hurtful for me.

There are a few people I want to thank for this epiphany: First and foremost, God, my bosses, my team, my office-mate and a few other people whom I got close to in the office.
I love my job and my workplace. I am very lucky to be hired there and I will use this opportunity to the fullest.

I am learning and growing. I want to change myself for the better and make everyone proud of me. And that's what I am and will continue to do and make everyone who really cares proud of me.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. It may seem all confusing...I am sorry I just wrote how I felt and I just had a strong desire to post this before I get busy with something else.